Mi papá tiene 47 años= my dad is 47 years old
Mi papa tiene 47 anos= my potato has 47 assholes
I love spanish
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A capital letter changes it even further:
Mi Papa tiene 47 anos = My pope has 47 anuses
literally the best post I have seen on this website
i hate when customers at work hand me a 100 dollar bill and then scoff when i check the watermark. like, lady, i will break out the counterfeit pen. i’ll draw your god damn portrait over benjamin franklin’s before i make a ruling. i’ll get a second opinion from a coworker on the opposite side of the store. i’ll call the mint like, “heyy…it’s daniel…you guys print any hundreds lately? i got a lady here with a hundred, just making sure it’s one of yours…haha cool just checking. so how are the wife and kids?” the people that make a fuss are always like, obviously rich too and you know that’s why they have a problem. like the nerve of me to doubt a rich person’s money. how dare i lump them in with a normal person with a hundred dollar bill. eventually one of them is going to let it slip. i’ll take the bill from them and go to hold it up to the light or feel it between my fingers or something and they’ll laugh and go, “oh, no, no no no i’m wealthy.”
i had a co-worker catch a counterfeiter. back then we all had “truth teller” pens. and the rule was “anything over a ten gets checked if you’re not comfortable with it” but not everyone did it. but this girl was hard core about her pen. especially if she got a bad feeling from a customer. girlfriend had TWO truth teller pens in case one gave a false positive.
this couple come through her line with a lot of stuff and they acting like they are in a hurry. this was the wrong thing to say to this girl. you say that to her and she goes slower cause it freaks her out.
she finally gets to the end and the guy hands her a bunch of 20′s. first she straightened them out and counted them, and then she took her pen out. when i used it i made a little flower so that i would know that i did it. she made a swirly. the first swirly came back black, the second swirly came back black. she got out the SECOND truth teller pen and scribbled a like down the center of the bills…. black as coal.
she was freaking out. dude look like he was intense. she very politely asked if he had another form of payment as she would not be able to accept his money. “WHY NOT?!”
*gulp*
“cause it’s not real, sir.”
“MONEY IS FUCKING REAL! YOU BETTER GET MANAGEMENT OVER HERE! MY MONEY IS AS GOOD AS ANYONE ELSE!!”
she very quickly walked over to the phone and paged, and her voice, was so tinged with panic that everyone, even CUSTOMERS stopped dead in their tracks and listened to the page.
you’d never seen a page answered so quickly. it was prolly ringing before she put the phone back on the receiver. “what’s wrong? what’s going on? are you in danger? are you okay?”
and she told them that no, she wasn’t okay,, her customer was screaming and cursing at her and his money wasn’t real and she had no idea what to do now, this wasn’t covered in the CBL’s!
this got manangement on their feet. “stay call, take a deep breath, we’ll be there in 5 seconds with back up. it’s going to be okay. just breathe.”
which is easier said than done with a man that weighs 150 lbs more than you is screaming his ever loving head off. even the retiree door greeter came over and stood by her just as a show of solidarity, she couldn’t really have done anything, but she was a witness, and sometimes that’s enough to get people to back down.
it must have felt like a hour later, but it was about 2-3 minutes before the store managers came walking down the aisle with the popo trailing behind them. the cops were soooooo happy to see him.
one member of management took over the register as the other led the cashier off to sit and collect herself, while the cops talked to the guy and eventually arrested both the guy and the girl. (apparently they’d been looking for them)
management was so fucking happy that she caught him because he had like 300 dollars in funny money and she caught him dead to rights. they calmed her down, thanked her profusely, gave her the rest of the day off with pay, and called her bf or mother or someone to get her home, because she was shaking like a leaf and they didn’t want to her to get hurt on her way home.
So yes, i will use my pen when i have too. i’ll hold them fuckers up to the light to make sure that the right pressie is in the corner pocket.
don’t fuck with the money honey it just don’t pay.
Can you just be there? Without asking questions? I can’t bring myself to answer any of your questions. I want to feel that you’re here for me. That’s all.
Please do no support Mi Vida shop in Los Angeles
Just a comment: i’ve seen Mi Vida Shop as an alternative place to shop instead of BellaDonaLA. However, this shop supports gentrification in my LA community and praised an article in the NY Times that was for gentrification because it had a picture of their store. When I told them gentrification is not okay they deleted my comments and did not hold themselves accountable. They view gentrification of my community as making it “better” and also commercialize latinx culture. They benefit directly from the gentrification of our community and it does not matter if they identify as LATINX they still can cater to gringos who are displacing us and praise gentrification. Please do not support Mi Vida shop.
- Bae: Tell me something sexy in Spanish
- Me: Agua. Tierra. Fuego. Aire. Hace mucho tiempo, las cuatro naciones vivían juntas en armonía. Entonces, todo cambió cuando la Nación del Fuego atacó. Solo el Avatar, maestro de los cuatro elementos, podría detenerlos, pero cuando el mundo mas lo necesitaba, se desvaneció. Cien años pasaron y mi hermano y yo descubrimos el nuevo Avatar, un maestro aire llamado Aang. Y aunque sus habilidades para controlar el aire eran grandiosas, tenia mucho que aprender antes de estar listo para salvar al mundo pero yo creo que Aang podra salvarlo.
I hope Stephen Hawking’s anti-capitalist and anti-imperialist politics aren’t erased from history, or obscured in our collective remembrance of him.
They erased MLK, George Orwell, and Hellen Keller’s anti-capitalist positions, they’ll definitely do they same for Hawking.
Hell, most people outright ignored it while he was alive.
Thinking about it, the best comparison is Einstein.
Einstein was a great advocate for socialism, economic and racial justice, and higher education, but the neoliberal capitalist system has reduced his accomplishments to “e=mc^2” and sell his likeness on pop t-shirts.
Crazy that the shit that all the geniuses agree on tends to be similar and nobody acknowledges it
By saying Orwell’s anti capitalism was lost to history means that you’ve never taken a literature class in your life. It’s literally the first thing any prof goes over when reviewing him in any unit of study.
1) Not everyone has access to a literature or political science class you fucking elitist idiot
2) This post isn’t about George Orwell
3) George Orwell was quite literally a British nationalist who thought that communism and fascism were equally authoritarian. Much of his work is used by reactionaries today for their own ends. He was a racist imperialist. And he wasn’t a true anti-capitalist either; he was merely a social democrat. Maybe if you read something other than Animal Farm or 1984, you’d know that.
Signed, a political science major.
101 Ways to be Productive When Classes Are Not In Session
- Get a job
- Learn guitar
- Learn piano
- Study a new language
- Purchase new study materials for the next semester (i.e new notebooks, a new pencil bag, a new backpack, new pencils, pens, or highlighters – 10/10 would recommend Crayola SuperTips they are extremely cheap!)
- Clean your room
- Clean your apartment/home
- Make your bed
- Make a list of your goals
- Exercise
- Write
- Find a new podcast (for my pre-law friends, I recommend Think Like A Lawyer)
- Read a new book
or read all of the books you have bought but not been able to read yet - Clean out your closet - donate clothes you do not wear anymore to Goodwill
- Clean out your car/wash your car (actually necessary to ensure that dirt does not accumulate in its parts - TRUST ME)
- Be a tourist in your own city - find a new coffee shop you might like to study at when classes resume
- Try new recipes - learn to cook by watching Youtube videos
- Start a new skin care routine (I recommend Noxema {app $4} for your face wash, follow it up with Witch Hazel {app $6} and finish with Tea Tree Oil {app $8}!)
- Start a new blog (or check out my new blog @tiny-personal-aesthetics-thing
I know I’m shameless) - Volunteer at local animal shelters, retirement homes, hospitals, libraries, Habitat for Humanity, etc.
- Redecorate your room - try moving your bed or furniture around and see how it changes the fung shui (if you are into that)
- Learn about photography
- Work on your mental and physical health
- Take your dog for a walk - I’m sure they would appreciate it
- Ride a horse
- Create a budget for yourself
- Start a bujo
- Draw
- Paint
- Watch a documentary
- Create goals for next semester
- Reflect on this past semester
- Learn self-defense
- Visit a museum or a park
- Sell items you don’t want anymore on apps such as Letgo or via the Facebook Market
- Start gardening
- Call friends/family you haven’t heard from in awhile
- Write friends/family you haven’t heard from in awhile
- Go for a hike
- Improve your vocabulary using resources such as: vocabulary.com, or enhancemyvocabulary.com
- Fix your sleep schedule (!!!)
- Learn about your family history
- Utilize Khan Academy videos to brush up on math, science, or humanities
- Clean out your email inbox
- Get a test prep book for the LSAT/MCAT/GRE
- Talk to an adultier adult in the field you wish to enter regarding your career options
- Work on your resume
- Increase your typing speed using websites such as: typing.com, typeracer.com, or rapidtyping.com
- Write thank you notes to professors/instructors/advisors that you found particularly helpful - or to friends/family/mentors that also helped you out
- Get your planner organized for the new semester (or buy a planner if you haven’t already)
- Find and price the textbooks and access codes you will need for the coming semester
- Jazz up/update your social media accounts (Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn) to reflect more on your professionalism (if you have those)
- Update your style - new semester, new clothes, new you
- Go swimming - nice low impact exercise
- Find a professional to shadow
- Find an internship
- Find scholarship opportunities (create a new email account to specifically use for scholarships!)
- Get a head start on the classes you will be taking by self-studying (a plethora of free information exists on the internet)
- Be a mentor - tutor high schoolers/junior high students for SAT/ACT prep, or generally for whatever subjects they need help in
- Do manual labor - fix something, build something, mow the yard, clean the gutters
- Do yoga
- Work on breathing exercises
- Treat yourself
- Learn to say no
- Go on graduate school tours
- Travel (can be near or far, cheap or expensive - know your budget)
- Do your own research project
- Take an online sample course via edX,or Coursera
- Start your graduate school application
- Pet sit for someone
- House sit for someone
- Start your own Youtube channel
- Work on your handwriting
- Try sculpting
- Attend networking events
- Attend leadership events
- Start a fundraiser for a cause
- Learn to code
- Study abroad - or solidify a study abroad trip
- Create a four year plan for your degree
- Visit family
- Visit a friend
- Get letters of recommendation
- Get crafty
- Take a practice test for the LSAT/ MCAT/ GRE
- Take all of your loose change to a CoinStar and exchange them for cash
- Learn about where your food comes from
- Drink more water
- Find an audio book to listen to when you are in the car or on the bus
- Catch up on your laundry
- Forge new good habits such as utilizing a planner or making your bed every day
- Start a compost pile
- Grow your own herbs
- Start meal prepping/meal planning
- Play basketball
- Play tennis
- Get a haircut
- Organize your desk
- Organize your laptop
- Learn about astronomy
- Rest, relax, and recuperate for the semester to come
organizeandstudy